Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Common Courtesy

I renamed this post a dozen times: things that make me angry; rules for our high speed lifestyles; etc. I'm just feeling frustrated. People everywhere just seem to be a little more selfish, a little less kind and allot more rude. I was planning on pointing out new rules we need for people, but then I realized most of them aren't that new. So basically its just a rant. A random list of things that are pissing me off.

1. At the Drive Thru- Pull Ahead! I don't care if you can order or not there are people lined up in the middle of the road because you don't think you need to pull ahead that car length until you can get to the speaker!

2. Did you know its actually the law that you should signal before you are half way through the turn? For real, other drivers might actually be interested in knowing the direction you plan on hurtling your thousand pounds of steel!

3. Why can't waitresses be allowed to write things down anymore? I get excited when I see a pen and paper, "oh my! They might actually get my order right!!"

4. How could you possibly think its Okay to subject entire stores full of people to your child who is screaming uncontrollably while you don't even so much as shush them????

5. And while we are on the topic of children, if you take your child somewhere, a store a restaurant- anywhere that they might come into contact with other humans. PAY ATTENTION TO THEM! I am tired of having some kid mouth off to me or be pulling stuff off the shelves of the store I'm in and there are no parents to be found! We had some kid skateboarding on a brand new still in the plastic skateboard off the shelf in superstore and there he is, ramming into people and his parents are..... Probably at home relaxing!

6. If you have accepted a job somewhere, do it. If you don't want to do your job, quit! It is very simple. Why do the rest of us have to suffer because you are unhappy? Especially if you live in Alberta- guess what? You can have a new job the same day if you don't like the one you have!

7. On that note, if I am at a restaurant and you do the bare minimum of your job by bringing me my food and clearing the plates- I'm not tipping you. I understand waiters and waitresses rely heavily on their tips, but you are being paid to do your job. You are being paid to take my order and bring food to the table. If you provide exceptional service, really nice, very conscientious I'll tip you. Tips are a gratuity, I am grateful for the extra little something you did for me, and you should be grateful for the tip. I should not feel obligated to tip for crappy service. And I'd appreciate it if you'd stop asking! If I want to add a tip to my bill I will, nothing like a request for a tip to make you lose one!

8. On the same topic, when can we start taking money off the bill for really crappy service? I think the 10 or 15% or whatever it is now should be a sliding scale. I'll tip you if you provide decent service, but if my meal is cold, or I have to wait an hour to get a cup of coffee that tip comes off the bill and I get a cheaper meal for having to put up with really crappy service.

9. Why does it take people so long to accelerate to the speed limit after sitting at a red light? Especially at turn lights. Do you not want to go? Why are there 3 car length spaces between you and the guy in front of you and now I have to sit through another red light- just go!

ARG!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

CATS FOR SALE!

I have 3 cats. 3 Fat, lazy cats. Lately the cats and I have noticed a scrtch scrtch scrtch noise coming from the walls. Mice. Mice are in my walls. I explain to the kitties that they only have 1 job. Do Not, Under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, allow mice to invade our home.

Saturday a mouse enters the house- THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR!

Kitties, I say, do your stuff- get rid of the mouse!

Sunday night/Monday morning 1am the little mouse runs from the kitchen to our bedroom. I grab the deadliest of the sleeping cats and throw him at the mouse. "Get It!" I yell,
And he does. He gets it, under his paw, lifts his paw to look at it....and it runs away. It starts hiding behind my laundry baskets (of which there are too many that are too full) so we move them and the cat runs after the mouse, and the mouse hides, and we move a basket... Repeat.
Out of baskets to hide behind the mouse runs out of the bedroom.

Now it's in the laundry room, behind the dryer.
We take all three cats into the laundry room.
We plug the entrance to the house.
We plug the entrances under the washer, dryer heater, everywhere he could go.
3 cats and a tiny room- this mouse is done!
Al scoots him out with a broom, he runs, the cats run, the mouse scoots through the 1/4 inch opening under the door and into the entryway.
Al flings open the door and the cats follow, out into the entry way, to the heater.

The mouse is in the heater.

I turn on the heat.
2 cats waiting in front of the heater....
Waiting....
Out comes the mouse and
BLAMMO! Gimli- the fattest, laziest cat we have- gets him, in his mouth!
Yeah for Gimli! Good Kitty, Way to do your...

He lets him go!

Not just lets him go, Tosses him away!

No No fat cat! This is not a toy!! Kill the mouse! Don't PLAY with the mouse!!!

And the chase is on again.

Al and I steering the mouse to the cats or the cats to the mouse.
Again he gets it! and again he tosses it away and bats it around, and then it runs....
Under this, Move that, Cat gets him, he runs, under this pull out that.... the cats decide- there is much too much running going on, they will just lie here, and eventually, the mouse will come back to them.

Kathunk!

Al gets the mouse.

3 Cats and 2 Humans vs 1 Mouse took 2 hours, and nearly destroyed my house!
At 3 am we had upturned laundry baskets in the bedroom, towels and laundry stuffed in every nook and cranny in the laundry room, and EVERY piece of furniture, coat, box, hat, heater, garbage, recycling in the entry way had been moved or tipped over. There was broken glass, a wholly mess and a dead mouse!

Anyone wanna buy a cat?